travel and rhum

I used to love taking long hikes alone in parks in and around my city. I never felt nervous or threatened and always stayed aware of my surroundings. But one time I had an experience that really shook me and I haven’t been able to go out again since. I was never confronted, and I never saw them, but I realized I was being watched from a tree line and when I turned to go the other way, I could hear the sound of footsteps running up on me. I took off in a sprint and made it to a safe place but I was terrified. I’ve seen makeshift tents in some of those woods before and I assume someone was squatting in this spot, too. But after posting about it in my local FB group, everyone cautioned me that those woods are notorious for violent crimes and I can’t shake the feeling that I narrowly escaped something awful.

It’s not that I wouldn’t go to a state park or somewhere more remote, it’s just that it scares me more. The fear of being followed on my hike, or being watched robs me of any ability to relax and enjoy it, especially if I’m far from other people. I just can’t let myself enjoy it.

My therapist has recommended I try to start going again because it’s one of my only joys in life and always has been. But I don’t know how to feel secure and safe. Aside from having bear spray or whatever, it’s more so that the experience is soured because I am worried the whole time that I might have to use it. How can I get past this?

-edited to add that I prefer hiking alone because it’s a quiet, solo, reflective time. The whole point for me is to be alone with nature-